Looping

I was obsessed with thinking the same troubling thought over and over again. I guess it happens to all of us at some time or another, or possibly daily. Something is troubling you and you keep replaying it in your mind like a gerbil on a wheel. The difference is that the gerbil seems to be having a good time. The continuous looping of the thought can drive you to distraction. Try as you might, the thought still insinuates itself into your consciousness. You may be able to keep it at bay for 15-20 minutes, particularly if you’re on some project that acts as a distraction, but usually it is ever present, and shadows you until the issue is resolved.

Considering the fact that I do a lot of yoga, and so it seems half the world does, we are supposed to put our attention on the breath. This, for me, greatly helps the looping but how long can you stay in down dog?

The breath is such a logical and safe object of attention that it is the most commonly used focus of meditation. As Andrew Weil, MD and author of NY Times best-seller “Spontaneous Happiness“ writes, “the more you can train yourself to shift attention away from emotionally upsetting thoughts (or images), the better off you will be, and the breath is a very safe place to shift it ­– rather than putting your mind’s engine in neutral.”

If you’re ever tried deep breathing, you understand how breath links body and mind, consciousness and unconsciousness. As in yoga, breath gives access to the involuntary nervous system and makes it possible to influence cardiovascular, digestive, and other functions ordinarily beyond conscious control. It’s also a way to calm the restless mind and facilitate one-pointed attention. It definitely promotes well-being.

Dr. Weil offers some simple rules for breath work in the above book. They are:

* Put your attention on the breath whenever possible

* Whenever you can, try to make your breathing deeper, slower, quieter and more regular

* Let the belly expand outward when you inhale

* To deepen breathing, practice exhaling more air at the end of each breath

As you know, when people are anxious, angry or upset, their breathing is always rapid, shallow, noisy and irregular.

Slow, deep, quiet, regular breathing simply can’t coexist with emotional upset.

Here’s another great breathing suggestion for anti-anxiety.

1 Place the tip of the tongue against the ridge behind and above the front teeth. Keep in there for the whole exercise.

2 Exhale completely through the mouth (and puckered lips), making a whoosh sound.

3 Close the mouth and inhale deeply and quietly through the nose to a silent count of 4.

4 Hold the breath for a count of 7

5 Exhale through the mouth to a count of 8, making the same sound

6 Repeat steps 3, 4 and 6 for a total of four breaths. You can do this in any position as long as the back is straight. Do this exercise 2 times a day whenever you feel stressed or anxious. If you find this helpful, after a month of doing the 4 breath exercise it’s suggested you increase to eight breaths twice a day, every day.

You will probably find that this breathing exercise will become a powerful means of inducing a state of deep relaxation and will stop anxiety and negative thinking in its tracks.

Another book by Dr. Weil which I’d highly recommend is “You Can’t Afford to Get Sick: Your Guide to Optimum Health and Health Care“

Positive Thinking

Did you ever meet someone who was positive all the time; who may even say, “it’s all good” even when confronted by enormous problems?  It’s a rare individual who can believe it’s all good or who seems joyful and happy even in the face of severe obstacles. This type of person makes me pretty suspicious because I sense there is more to them than meets the eye.  They seem totally unrealistic and perhaps even in LaLa Land!

Being human makes us susceptible to feeling ill at ease, anxiety prone or just unhappy at times.  It’s an inevitability that we’re not going to start our day in rapture for our perfect lives.  I’m not saying you should wallow in self-pity if things go pear-shaped.  But, there’s a moment to move on and figure out how to deal with the situation without being psychologically impotent and caught in a downward spiral.

The individual who is always positive may often use it as a cover-up for unpleasant feelings such as anger, sadness, worry and depression.  I think it’s possible that this type of person is just as psychologically unbalanced as the person who overindulges in negative feelings. As Dr. Robert Anthony, suggests in his book, “Secrets of Total Self Confidence“, found on Amazon, “Real life is about feeling the ups and downs and knowing there is something good and positive to be found during our feelings of sadness and disappointment.”

I would agree with that statement.  How else can we contemplate different ways to look at situations and then make positive changes and improvements?  In fact, some of the best decisions we’ve ever made are realized in a time of crisis.  I suggest we acknowledge our feelings and let them happen, in order to work through them as opposed to covering them up and smiling like some zombie on Zoloft.

If the Genie Could Grant Your Wish

I’m reminded about how parental fears and concerns are inadvertently passed on to their kids. I had my class write essays on the theme of what they would change about their lives if they were granted a wish from a genie. The children I work with are anywhere from 12-14, and this happened to be a class of low readers. To my surprise, about 1/3 of the class wrote about their fears for their family and how their parents were having financial struggles or health issues. They wanted to be of help, but didn’t know how. Fear, worry, and anxiety naturally come up for many of us. It’s part of life. It’s hard to contain, and it’s also hard to keep the kids from picking it up by osmosis. We live in a complex world where all our buttons can be pushed, and it is very important to remind ourselves that the wolf is not at the door.

What I’m suggesting is that we try to deconstruct our mindset by using visualizations, affirmations, and some focused attention on what we do want to create. I have given a technique a couple of time called “The Flip Switch”, suggested by hypnotist and author, Dr. Robert Anthony. This is about replacing any negative thought you have (when you realize it), and replacing it with a positive thought and holding the thought for between 20-30 seconds. This allows for new neural pathways in the brain to develop, as well as raising your frequency to accommodate more positive experiences. When you’re calmer and when you can view the landscape of your thoughts under a looking glass, you can change the outcome of most situations. Once again, use meditation, use breathing, take some quiet time for yourself, watch a funny movie, and use the Flip Switch technique. Certainly, your child will benefit as well as you.

Are You a Nut in a Rut?

You may have heard the phrase “if the acorn yearns to be an oak tree, the oak tree is emerging in the acorn.”  In short, when you affirm or intend, as the acorn did, the potential begins to emerge.

The minute you have a desire, such as to acquire more wealth, the thought often begins to bump up against your beliefs, whatever they are.  As an example, if your belief is that rich people got their money through illegal channels or off the backs of other people’s labors, you are immediately showing a mind-set of lack and limitation.  In this case, the limiting belief held, creates an inner pressure. This inner pressure can lead to illness, anxiety, and depression.

The acorn must die for the oak tree to be born.  What I’m suggesting is, we need to consciously yield and surrender when we realize our belief systems are creating this inner pressure, or we will go into a crisis.  Unfortunately, most people who go into a crisis tend to suppress them, and they are therefore thwarting the opportunity to evolve.  Let a crisis show you the way to destroy limiting beliefs and understand that this crisis is showing you an alternate way out of the situation – a chance to grow.  Move forward in difficult times, and tap into a vision for your life by looking for clues and synchronicities.

We need to let go of negative belief patterns, or they will unfold as a crisis.  Here’s another nut analogy.  “Some seeds require a forest fire to crack their tightly wound shells open.”